Entirely Petty Rankings: Best Team Name

A good name can do you wonders. If your name is, let's say, Mason Masters, people assume you're ruggedly handsome and very talented. On the other hand, a name can give people pretty lackluster expectations. If you're named Bruce Bourdreau, for example, people assume you're going to flame out of the playoffs every April. So having a good name as a franchise is important. It not only sets a tone but can influence the future of your team for years to come. The Central has some great ones, but it also has some real stinkers. So here's Mason Masters' ruggedly handsome list of best team names in the Central Division.

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Do's & Don'ts: The Central's Guide to Glory & Ruin

We only have a handful of games left in the season and for those of you who root for teams who don’t hail from Dallas & Chicago, congratulations! You’re still playing meaningful hockey. The Central is stacked and five teams are currently angling to make it through the last week of play unscathed. For the teams that do make it through, they’ll not only receive a shiny new patch on their chest but renewed hopes of Stanley Cup glory. Each team has a path that can get them to the promised land. Each team has demons within that can spell disaster for their season. Let's take a look at what has to go right, and what can go very, very wrong for these contenders if they make it to the season's after-party. 

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You Better Watch Out! Central Division Naughty & Nice List

We are three months into the NHL's 100th season so far, every team, except for Minnesota, has led the Central Division for at least a night. Even Colorado, who is objectively awful, continue to have moments of inspired play. This wide-open division might be the cream of the crop in the NHL, & justly has millions of eyes on its teams week in & week out. Obviously, one pair of those eyes belong to Santa himself. The jolly bringer of gifts from the frozen north is an avid hockey fan & he has been tweaking his naughty & nice list since the offseason. So here it is folks, a Central Divided exclusive from St. Nick himself, directly from the North Pole:

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Smashville V Steel City: Mustard Yellow For Everybody!

Boys and Girls, we have reached that time of the year that is as magical as it is fleeting, the Stanley Cup Finals. In the next two weeks, men from all walks of life will fight over every square inch of ice to cement their legacy as champions. The teams they represent have dreams of glory; one team on the verge of successfully retaining the Cup for the first time in 20 years, and the other hopes to take it home to one of the most unique fan bases in sports for the very first time. The Nashville Predators and Pittsburgh Penguins will bring speed, toughness, and way too much yellow to the Stanley Cup Finals on Monday. Here’s how it will all shake out.

Before we begin, let me (Mason Masters) just say the opinions that follow are mine and are not Zack McCann’s because the only words he’s been able to conjure in his mind since Nashville’s Game 6 victory have been expletives. 

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Five Hockey Players That Make Slap Shot Look Tame

It’s Stanley Cup playoff time, which is my favorite time of the year, and things are starting to get exciting. Tensions are rising on the ice, and that can lead to some pretty brutal acts in the name of Eternal Canadian Glory. If you aren’t familiar with this incredible sport of ice, steel, and missing teeth, you are probably aware of its cinematic ambassador: Slap Shot. The Paul Newman classic is famous for its zany and stereotypical portrayal of hockey players. The antics those fictional characters get into though are nothing compared to the lives of these very real players listed below. Enjoy, and don’t forget to keep your head up!

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